Another innings

comes to end

In  no specific order,  here I go:

--  learnt to lead a team which had only men (who says gender doesn't matter in the modern day office setup? It does! .Detailed post on this later)

-- learnt to lead a team which had men senior to me in age, experience, educational qualification

-- learnt NOT to attach myself to the company or team.

-- Woke up to check emails, and have called it a long day just after sending the last email. Been on calls that lasted hours together for at-least 3 days a week

-- Had busy weekdays with conference calls that occupied my evenings every single day of the week

-- Been away from FB,Blog , constant mail checking for a long stretch at times

-- had very very less gossip :)

-- Used time effectively when the need arose

 -- Had a good feeling when team members approached me for every problem:little or big. felt even better wen team members came over to update me on whats happening in their project wen we all move to different teams/projects

 -- Felt surprised many many times when we got to know that a colleague was leaving the company just one day or even on the last day of the engineer. Wondering how in this organisation, news does NOT spread like fire, trickles much much slower :) Felt amazed at how can information be withheld when the notice period duration is full 3 months and hardly are people relieved before serving the complete notice period

-- Amazed to see a LOT of employees working in the same organisation (some in the same technology/project) for more than a decade (I have seen this trait among my colleagues in the US, but seeing Indians being so loyal to the same organisation in the IT field for decades together is first for me.). 

-- Having worked in an organisation which atleast had some way for employees to vent their frustration(doesn't matter if someone is hearing them and taking action, that's a different matter altogether), this one was a shocker for me and I realized in a few months that I have also got used to it and don't crib anymore (cos, there is no company/group for me to join the crib sessions :) ). yes, when it comes to employee benefits, I would say, I can still work in an org that gives very very minimal benefits ( I've heard employees say that work from home policy makes up the absence of all other benefits)

-- I would like to think that I gained the trust of my managers and colleagues (at-least a few of them). There have been many lessons learnt and hope to rectify mistakes in the future, like closing the loop, following up etc

-- Have got frustrated many times when I had to do a managers job (when I don't hold the title nor I'm paid a managers salary) ,when I'm told  to follow up on the email that I'd sent (I thought people who receive emails to respond to them.,No, here, I was told that when I don't receive a response, I need to go behind the person to get what I want..Yes, doesn't matter that the email recipient is also an employee of the same organisation and not the son/daughter of the company's majority stake holder!) , when I need to track my team members work (Aarg! I hate doing this), when I need to fill loads of xl sheets and ppt (wait, this is what I meant in having to do managers do right,so let me stop here), wen my boss constantly says "Go talk to people ,interact and make your name known to everyone. " , no proper transport facility .

-- hardly went for tea/coffee to cat and gossip. Can count the number of times I went for tea/coffee breaks.

-- Did a good amount of work from home in the recent past , but wish I were more disciplined. If on a particular day,I were to work from home, I would probably bath at 4, have food at irregular times and will end up having a loooong day hooked to the PC. At these times, I have felt that going to office is much better as I will anyway be forced with a "travel time" where the time is mine:)

-- Took leave only when necessary and ended up giving up leaves to the organisation

-- Didnt do any holiday wile in this org..This is something I need to change

-- Did comparatively less team lunches. 

-- Could have taken the initiative with the girls group to go out more often . Missed the opportunity and a lesson to be learnt

-- Could have taken effort to get more closer to one or two . The opportunity was there, but the effort was not put..probably all the time was spent in trying to lay the foundation but the strength was not given..Somehow, I've forgotten the art of  getting closer to anyone in office. Will need to change this. Should give it a try next time

-- Having moved to another project the last 6 months where te pressure was relatively lesser, I took it wit both hands and enjoyed my stint here as well. 

-- Had the opportunity to have  mentors (formal allocation) and I was a mentor too. I should have made good use of their gyaan and inputs , hope to implement them in future.

-- Had the opportunity to be a mentor and discovered the patience levels within me.(not too much!!)

-- For a person who got used to being picked up and dropped by comfortable office bus everyday, I had to change buses, use different modes of transport either way to reach my work place at-least for 2.5 years and I somehow managed it

-- Overall a good stay in the organisation, I didn't attach myself to it, I didn't plan specifically to leave either. Just going with the flow..Lets see whats in store.

And thus, this innings comes to an end. 

Wish me luck and wishing the company the best! :)

Post 4: The crest, trough and the median..

Let me do some career/work/work place related post today..

When I began my career, like the thousands of fresh graduates who join the work force, I was also very ambitious, full of energy and all set and willing to put in the hard work to learn, earn and grow up in the ladder..I have put in many late-nights while I was single and even after I got married, I made sure to give in as much as I could without disturbing my personal life to a big extent. Along the way, I also started comparing myself against my peers, my batchmates, the competition grew bigger and tougher, politics was being played at the work-place.

 At a certain stage, there used to be so much of talk/discussion/gossip about how one person is being paid more while he/she doesn't do half the work that the other does, how the manager is favoring a certain individual, how tactically that one needs to project their achievements  when it comes to appraisal, how one needs to convince the manager , how we'll have to fight it out or in better words, how one needs to play it smart to move up the chain..Added to all this is when a new person joins the team , how certain work is allotted to the person which is not given to another who has stayed in the team for a longer duration, and how much people who are recruited are paid more while employees loyally working for the team are given peanuts would be the talk/buzz in the team ..While  the work  environment being filled with such not-so-obvious-but-still-something-hovering-around atmosphere, it is quite natural that any employee would be dragged into such talks and thoughts of all these would keep lingering in the mind even after office-hours..It required great amount of strength, grit and a strong I-know-what-I-want-from-work clarity of mind to stay away and to not let these affairs at work not affect an employee..Since I didnt belong to the above category, obviously, I fell in the trap and also got the opportunity to see that side of the coin..Though everything would look perfect from outside, each team member was recording  instances when he/she helped another team member and brought this up while giving feedback ..There are a few who would act smart and talk technical stuff only when the manager is in vicinity and try to put down others, there are some who would do the same job allotted to you and always try to compete with you and prove that he could do the same job faster than you..Since I was also in the rat-race trying to move along, all these used to trouble me so much and I used to wonder if I should also behave tactically. But , soon I realsied that I couldnt, it only increased my frustration..
I also have to mention here that while working under the same environmental conditions described above, I've also had instances where I've excelled, not once or twice, but many times..I've tried my hand at innovation, writing /publishing papers, handling multiple responsibilities, mentoring , deep diving and becoming an expert in a paritcular domain..I've also experienced phase where things were not just going my way, the code broke down, i sought help from my team member, a particular issue was blown out,I was pointed fingers at..I've also had the experience of getting up from the fall, re-proving my skills and talent..

When things were going well, naturally, I was happier, was motivated, worked harder. when things were not good, it affected my confidence levels (this happened when I was undergoing personal crisis as well,), my self-esteem was at its low, and it affected my mental and physical health..having gone through the crest and trough, I've realised , its not worth the pain..meaning, taking work way too seriously , having the burning desire to compete and win, always aiming for that promotion or hike doesnt help or work out in the long run and doesnt give much returns back to you..That doesnt mean, I believe in staying relaxed, not meeting deadlines, not doing a good job at work..For the last one year , I've been trying to have a equanimous state of mind, when it comes to work and work-place.

I go to work, trying to learn , trying to contribute my best, doing a good job at what I do..I dont anymore care about what others think about my skill-set (earlier, when there was an instance when my work wasnt upto the mark, which I've mentioned earlier, I felt so bad about myself..I was more concerned about what others would think about my skills and when people made remarks , it hurt me badly and I was in self-doubt).I'm not  a super-duper genius and I accept that there are many  technical aspects in my domain that I do not know and I'm ready to learn if my job demands it..Especially now, the worries about career growth, competing with others dont bother me..I only try to set goals for myself and try to achieve them..With this state of mind, I'm contended than before .Touch wood and kala Tikka!!