Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Hearing lots a good news

Last few days, I've been hearing news of people welcoming little bundle of jou in their lives..Feeling happy for them..such news bring in some kinda hope within me, that miracles are possible..Waiting for my turn..Is someone up there listening?
Office work is a little ok these days, compared to the madness that existed in the previous months..Sat for the year end discussion and got loaded with all the expectations that the management expects from me..Was feeling not very Ok for the few days, was constantly thinking if I made a wrong decision by shifting jobs, but made peace within myslef and decided to take one day at a time, do whatever I can at work and leave the rest to the Lord above..Have decided not to add up work related stress on myself..
Went to Chennai to attend an engagement ceremony..Days preceeding to the travel, I underwent so much of an emotional stress ..The very thought of every Tom,Dick and Harry checking up on me if if I was getting my periods regularly, if there was any good news, if I was consulting Doctors, or what the Doctors were suggesting etc and etc..simply killed me and I tried my best not to take it on to my husband (which I usually end up doing, though unintentionally and out of getting to saturation point within myself). This time I did fare well comparatively, but I need to work harder on this aspect.
Looks like one of my cousins had an early morning dream that I delivered a baby girl and had named her Priyanka and this dream  was doing the rounds in the family circle  and people were wishing that this dream be true. I appreciate the fact that the cousin (whom I 'm not in touch with ) dreamt something nice , and shared it..but the news doing the rounds was not was I liked...anyways, not everything I like happens anyways..But was just wondering if people were doing a comedy out of me and my situation by passing the word along..Anyways, let her dream come true..
Sometimes, or rather last couple of days, I've been feeling very low and the thoughts of whom to blame for whatever has happened, and thoughts of what-if I'd taken a different decision has been doing rounds in my devilish brain and I'm feeling highly dis-oriented and not sure what to do..
I'm trying hard to focus , have the faith , accept the fact that whatever happens, its due to the will of the Lord..I'm trying, I hope I get some peace within me and try to build on the faith in the Almighty.
Whoever is reading (if at all there are any), can you please help me in telling what you would do when the going gets tough, really tough that too for a longer duration..I know there is no one -set formula or a list of guidelines or steps to follow that will help us get up from the fall, but would like to know if I 'm the one reacting to a difficult situation this way, that others are matured and deal sensibly. My friend and I always keep discussing that if it were for someone else, they would have faced/face this situation in a much better way..

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

The month that was..

October was packed with loads of shopping, busier weekends, a deadline at workplace, festivities, the usual crest and trough of my mood swings , good food, a short travel to my parents', a loong pending pooja at home (on which MIL was planning for almost a year..), a quick visit by parents to our place for the pooja, a road travel from my parent's to our place after a loong time, lots of shopping again (all the shopping trips initiated by M and thats the highlight), and finally a hair cut..

yeah, I've been growing my hair for about close to 2 years now , and it had grwon pretty weel, but without any volume..towards the end, it tapered and wasnt looking neat and nice..I hadnt bothered about the looks all the while and went about mainitaing the same as usual..But, somewhere suddenly I felt the need to have a hair cut and was quite wavery about whether to have one or not..The day dawned , went for a cut and when I came out of the parlour, my hair was cut quite short..half of what it was earlier..Now, I being me, started cribbing about the short hair..(What would happen if I dont crib, uh?) Got a good dose of scolding from M, still continued to be obsessed about the short hair and made a fuss..Recording it here with a hope that atleast if I vent it out, I might stop the fuss..Now, waiting for my hair to grow..

More to pen down..Rest in next post..