Sunday, May 4, 2014

A few questions and some observations :1

-- Why is it that I feel home sick, look forward to go to parents place, be nice first two days and pick up a fight with Amma the third day? I dont want to fight, but end up pouting/arguing for some silly reason..Amma being Amma , inspite of all the natak that I do, makes poli, badam cake, apple-mango juice, gets me fresh sugarcane juice, nungu, straight of the field veggies just because I like them and is extreeemeely patient and kind and nice to all, especially to the evil me. Am I the only terrible soul on this planet to scold and fight with her mother?

-- Summer is too hot this year in Bangalore, many parts of Tamilnadu. What are we doing to our earth? Is this Nature's way to teach us a lesson, and when will we humans learn , will be ever take a hint and start being nice to Mother Earth?

-- I have read and hear many people say that they can sleep anywhere, irrespective of the surroundings. Little did I know that if sleep were to overcome me, I can also sleep under a aluminum roof in a mid-day hot sun with sweat flowing all over in a thinnai and not caring about people around.

-- What makes people throng to a place and and listen to all the pooja being done to the diety even if they have to sit close to one-another under the scorching sun with the sweat and sounds of one person rubbing on to the one sitting/standing next to you. Is it due to the power of Namasankeerthanam combined with the presiding Diety that makes one and all forget caste/creed demarcations and just be one in front of HIM atleast for sometime?

-- While in front of the Diety , the so called madi-aacharam Brahmins mingle with one and all, what prevents them from sitting next to a group of people who they think are lower in certain aspects than them (Talk of dirt in minds vs dirt in physical body) ?

-- Irrespective of whatever you give the maid, why is she  unhappy? Is it wrong to treat them equals and provide them with all that within your reach and limits while they go on a cribbing spree asking for gifts for every full moon and new moon?

-- On the same maid note, I need to vent out an incident which happened a few weeks ago. The maid went absconding without leave for few days and on the 5th day, I enquired the watchman if she has signed in the register and come for work today. He replied in the negative and I got a return call from the same watchman and he started asking me questions like how long have we employed this maid and commented how are we managing with her for she is known to take leave without informing and that she takes leave very very often and quotes all possible reasons which seem glaringly false. I just nodded in return and cut short the conversation. The maid makes an entry the next day and even before she takes a few steps inside the house, she asks for hot coffee (mentions that she has headache) and me being me, rushed in to open a new packet of milk and make sure I give her strong coffee (I doubt if I have been this diligent in giving coffee to my MIL so far(;) and ask her if she would like to have some toasted bread etc. Her headache is in my mind and I dont ask her reason for absence for she will go in to explanation mode and I did not want to hurt her by mentioning what the people in the apartment talk of her . After 10 mins, I enter the kitchen to empty the cooker which has beetroot in it and while she sips her coffee, she comments " Ungalukku Samaikave varadhu la" (You dont know to cook!!) . I didnt know what to tell her back. Needless to day, I was quite taken aback.  I thought to myself that all for me trying to be nice with her, I probably got a good response ! Phew! What makes people pass random comments like this? After gathering my thoughts I replied  " Samaika theriyamaya saapadarom?" and I cut short the conversation very quickly after this. Who on earth invented the idea of passing unsolicited comments to all and sundry , especially if the said comment(s) hurt others?

-- Do I alone belong to a family of people who talk only about people, yes, why is it that every time I speak to some relative, they want to know entire details of when I bath, what I'm doing now till where do I go and shop. I do agree that things like these make for good conversation etc, but why is it that people are so interested in knowing every little detail of whats happening in others life ? You wont believe if I say my aunt asked me if my sister got internship through college or through some reference. Even before she goes to her internship company, we get questions of if lunch will be served by the company and if its subsidized? Auntyji, do you want us to go and check on all these even before we join? And moreover, how does it matter to you auntyji? I know the answer: to go around and spread this tid-bit of an information to all those who have ears to hear. One suggestion for you and people like you : Please switch on the TV, especially any news channel. There are many more interesting stuff happening in the world!

-- Why is it the I get jitters on the day when MIL is going to return back after her vacation? My stress levels increase on this particular day, by checking if the kitchen is clean, if fridge is decently stocked, if the house is decently cleaned and plan for that day's bfast/lunch/dinner . I try to just relax and let it be, but I've not made considerable progress in this aspect yet.

More questions and observations in another post.


  1. Dang ! Twice I wrote a long reply to each point, and both times I lost it. Pretty annoying to type out again.
    1. Parents are like that. You'll know when your kids grow up.
    2. Summer showers in Chennai. Bliss.
    3. I can.
    4. My God is within me and I don't want to brave sweat, sound and smells to pray.
    5. Agyanam
    6. My maid is vey sweet, but inlaws and parents have the same problem.
    7. Give her the coffee and then blast her.
    8. My maid complains about my culinary skills as well. I have told her to not eat if it bothers her. She continues to eat and complain. So, you aren't alone.
    9. Don't let them talk to you about other people. I don't. My porandaathu people believe I am "reserved" and pukkaathu people think I am "cold and distant". But I like it that way.
    10. I get the jitters too. And my mil does not even cohabitate with us.

  2. Ramya.. I am ditto like you, so you need not worry of you are weird or something. Not only do I fight with my mom, I fight with dad too. Some argument comes up. If they dont understand us, who will? :)

    Exactly! Bangalore is terribly hot. What have we dont to this earth! :(

    Sometimes I wonder that too.. like is it the God or the entire belief of all the people gathered in a temple that brings up some vibes. Though I question God a lot, I cant say I dont believe in him.

    What?!!!! Your maid said that to you? After you gave her coffee - cutting open a new pack of milk? If someone gives me coffee in hand, esp when I have headache, I would fall on their feet. Too much this maid of yours has said.

    I know those aunties. Who want every small detail. Its so bugging. And you cant even ignore them.

    MIL has never come here except for the very first time. Its me who go to her all the time. While I really want her to stay with me for some days, its uncomfotable - though she is sweet and all that.

  3. :) One more evil one here. I am the same.
    Feel terribly homesick - Book Tickets - Bore everyone about going home - Go home - Be the nicest daughter ever for the first 2 days - Fight with mamma for the silliest of reasons - Not talk to her for a day but shamelessly eat every single thing she makes - Hug her and somehow say sorry and patch up - return back
    A month passes and the same story repeats. This has been going on forever. Donno if people(like ME) really ever grow up!!.

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  6. this is a very late comment but still what your maid said irked me so much i had to comment!!! Few people! Cant change them! If there is one thing(among many others heehee) that I feel thankful to be abroad is that, I dont have to deal with a maid, phew!